Trusting

I may not understand Lord, but I trust you.

About a month ago, as I was praying, the Lord asked me something that I was not prepared for.

"Child, do you trust me?"

"Of course I do, Lord!" Was my answer.

"I want you to give two of your alpacas back."

"Operator? Hello? I think we had a miscommunication, for a moment it sounded like He wanted me to give two of my alpacas back!!"

Give two of my alpacas back!! Which two?

"The two pregnant ones." Came the soft answer.

On that very same day, my parents came to me and casually said something like: "Caity, have you ever thought of giving your two pregnant alpacas back? I'm sure the former owner would take them."

Later in the day, I got an e-mail from the former owner saying that if I ever wanted to give the alpacas back, she would come and get them.

Triple Whammy! Ouch that hurt.

Well, that was a month ago. It's taken me this long to yield.... To surrender.... To trust.

I tried everything.... "Lord, I just got them!"

"But they were a gift!"

"But Salinda hasn't had her baby yet!"

"But I want to keep them!"

"I haven't sheared them yet!"

"I don't understand Lord."

"Why do I have to give them back?"

Etc...

His patient answer was always: "Child, do you trust me?"

My untrusting reply was always: Yes, but...

Finally, like a wayward lamb coming back to the fold, I yielded.

That's all I had to do.

Just trust.

For the first time in a month, I felt peaceful. It was that feeling you get when you know you did the right thing. I e-mailed the former owner, who came today and picked up Salinda, Altimira and my little baby 'paca.

Actually, 'baby 'paca', has a name now. My dad came up with the winning name of:

"Tumnus". :)

We finally gave up trying to think up a name that would look good on his papers, instead we went with a name that fit his personality.

He was a goofy, curious little fellow, and the name Tumnus just seemed to fit.

I may not understand why I had to give them back, but I trust the Lord.

~Caitlyn